Someone once took a large black ink marker and wrote “Help” on the bottom of the groom’s left shoe and “Me” on the bottom of the right shoe. So when he knelt down for his vows, the entire congregation saw it. Of course, this will only work if he must kneel with back to congregation (i.e. Catholic wedding). Make sure you get it so that it is readable with the shoes side by side, left to right, toes toward the floor. Do this far enough in advance so that the paint is dry before the groom wears the shoes to avoid damaging carpets.Besides “Help Me”, other possible message to write on the soles are (with varying degrees of cruelness): Left Shoe (I’m With) Right Shoe (Stupid [pointing arrowhead]); Left Shoe (Quick, Call 911!) Right Shoe (Never Mind, I’m Doomed!)
May 14, 2008
May 7, 2007
Funny Adult Joke - Son of Bitch
Funny Adult Joke - Son of Bitch
A sixteen year old virgin girl goes to confession. "Father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch yesterday."
"Why did you call him a son-of-a-bitch??" the priest asked.
"Because, Father, he touched me on my arm without permission."
"Do you mean like this??" He touches her arm.
"Yes Father."
"That's no reason for calling him a son-of-a-bitch."
"But Father he also touched my breasts."
"You mean like this??" He touches her breasts.
"Yes Father."
"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."
"But Father, he took off my clothes."
"Like this??" He takes off her clothes.
"Yes Father."
"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."
"But Father, he then put his you-know-what in my you-know-where."
"Like this?" He put his you-know-what in her you-know-where.
"Yes Father," she says sometime later.
"But that's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."
"But Father, he has AIDS."
"THAT SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!!!!!!!"
